Ikut hati mati, ikut rasa binasa..kata org tua2 gitulah.. sometimes btul jugak.. but it's so hard though to make a decision.. especially when it involves people we love.. we also don't know whether that decision that has finally been made is wright or wrong since we don't know the future right?
happy k kte nnt, kcwa k.. maybe a short-lasting happiness? or maybe happiness di dunia saja? ap yg dicari sebenarnya? kebahagiaan dunia akhirat of course, long lasting, 4ever n always, forever n ever n ever (with a nice loving husband and adorable kids).. tapi apa usaha kita nak achieve impian tu.. how to get the nicest husband in the universe if me myself ni xjadi baik dulu.. nak je tapi xreti2 nak usaha. tu le paseinye.. xpenah ad usaha nak brubah.. doing things ikut perasaan je..
how to get the determination.. respect sungguh la kat org2 yg dapat hidayah dpd Allah... alangkah bertuahnye dia jadi pilihan utk dapat hidayah tu.. hmm..
me.. normal, ordinary teenager dgn jantina perempuan.. fitrah darah muda ni tau je lah.. enjoy sana sini je kjenye.. doing things ikut perasaan je.. (again)
how will my life ended? is it in a good way? please God, take me in a good way.. is there anyone will pray for my kesejahteraan nanti when i'm in that sempit space deep in the ground.. nak aje aku stay single xyah kawin2..bercinta nak, tp xnak kawin boleh?ihik.. :P
tp.. kang sape lak nak take care of me when i'm old and pray for me when i'm gone.. semoga dapat zuriat yg soleh solehah.. amin...
bila tengok dunia sekarang.. takutnye.. sejarah hidup sepanjang 21 tahun ni pun, xde ap yg baik.. i'm a bad girl... sooo bad.. not everyone know about this.. but in reality.. that is me.. kalau x, xkan la some people call me bitch right?? ;P gotcha!! hihi.. it's ok.. my fault to him is HUGEEE!!
Him who??? hihi.. my sweet guy.. FYI, i've dumped him.. 4 another man.. who's nearer.. such a bad girl, aren't I?? It's not my direct intention to hurt him like that.. At first, I just wanna hang out.. girls around me, slalu je go to date with their bf.. who am i to stop them (pendam je dlm ati) but that do affect me in some way.. I wanna do that too.. But could I?Jauhnye cik abgku ni.. smpai k ngara matahari terbit peginye.. actually bagus la macam tu.. xelok keluar slalu laki pompuan lum kawin nih.. but as I mentioned, I'm just a girl.. Kpala otak ni x matang2 lagi berfikir.. Ikut perasaan..
he's such a guy, very nice guy, my ex.. sgt disayangi oleh mak.. in a relationship, there's always up and down right.. Org tua2 kata, sedangkan lidah lagikan tergigit.. That's then, it's me who cannot stand the storm..
Now, I CANNOT turn back already.. our story back then CANNOT be a happy ending anymore.. we are done.. I'm too far now... I have to let it go.. yes, did u think it's only u who can't move on.. me too, dear.. buat2 je mcm da move on.. hakhak.. pity me.. kesian btul.. kesian ap? padan muka lagi ada.. ;) tambah plak kalau ad bnda yg org pggil internet ni.. jadila aku miss stalker yg-sgt-patut-dikesian-and-dipadan-mukakan..
Regret tinggalkan dia?? Yes.. No.. Yes.. No.. He's my beautifulest memory ever.. (ad k word beautifulest?? taram je..) No.. We cannot regret the past, we can only do better next time.. Mistakes is made for us to learn, not to regret.. it had happened anyway..
Regret to be with the new guy? Yes.. No.. Yes.. No.. haha.. No lah.. How could I regret something that try to make me smile all day.. I truly accept and appreciate him and try to love him as much as I could.. I'm still trying my best.. He's always there for me physically and mentally when I need him which the other 'he' impossibly do..
Macam2 mna pun, it doesn't feel right.. sentiasa ad dat feeling of....ap ea? mm, but negative feeling... coz I got what I've always wanted by hurting a good guy's heart tooooo much.. In my mind, it's always him.. Oh.. what have I done, God knows how much I've hurt him..
But in here, the same pain also.. and.. last but not least........
nota utk mak:
Mak.. please mak.. Me and him is over.. we have to move on living our life without each other.. No mak, dont't talk to me about him and don't talk to him about me anymore.. please mak.. It hurts.. 4 both of us.. I beg u... Restui atin...N maafkan atin..
** petikan yg dipetik berbunyi:
"I'm sorry for you OP, weird though, after my first gf, where I did all that and everything, I already learned that the nice guy doesn't actually work. I am now an asshole and it's working great, you know. Not the all retarded type of asshole, just the teasing one and such. Well, I also learned I can never get over my first, and that I regret ever meeting her, even though the time with her was totally amazing. She broke me. Bitch."
Just so u know: I'm dat bitch he mentioned always in his blog.. But it's ok.. he has all the rights to say that.. N.. Pls don't judge me badly.. Try to be in my shoes.............
I'm truly sorry...
THOSE DAYS TO BE REMEMBERED
Friday, December 24, 2010
Did u ever feel like something stuck in your mind..
u wanna let it out.. but u can't..
no matter how hard u try..
it keeps coming even though u don't want it sgt2..
kdg smpai tersasul2 kuar ikut mulut plak..
haih.. truk btul lah..
mmg masalah negara btui!
huh.. what the...
** venus and mars.. lalala~
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
I shouldn't have walked away
I would've stayed if you said
We could've made everything OK
But we just
Threw the blame back and forth
We treated love like a sport
The final blow hit so low
I'm still on the ground
I couldn't have prepared myself for this fall
Shattered in pieces curled on the floor
Super natural love conquers all
'Member we used to touch the sky
And
Lightning don't strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry
True love's a gift
We let it drift
In a storm
Every night
I feel the angels cry
C'mon babe can't our love be revived
Bring it back and we gon' make it right
I'm on the edge just tryin' to survive
As the angels cry
I thought we'd be forever and always
You were serenity
You took away the bad days
Didn't always treat you right
But it was OK
I do somethin' stupid
And you still stay with me
But you can only go for so long
Doing the one you claim to love wrong
Before too much is enough
You look up
Find your love gone
And
We were so good together
How come we could not weather
This storm and just do better
Why did we say goodbye
'Cause lightning don't strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry
True love's a gift
We let it drift
In a storm
Now every night
I feel the angels cry
C'mon babe can't our love be revived
Bring it back and we gon' make it right
I'm on the edge just tryin' to survive
As the angels cry
Baby I'm missin' you
Don't allow love to lose
We gotta ride it through
I'm reaching for you
Baby I'm missin' you
Don't allow love to lose
We gotta ride it through
I'm reaching for you
Lightning don't strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry
True love's a gift
But we let it slip
In a storm
Every night
I feel the angels cry
Oh babe, the angels cry
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Jangan disusun kata-kata penamat
Jangan disebut baris ayat keramat
Biar lenyap diserap sunyi
Biar senyap yang tak menyepi
Tolong ingatkan aku
Kisah kau tersedar
Dengan saku penyeluk masa
Mari patahkan papan markah lama
Mari padamkan buku tiga lima
Biar luka sembuh sendiri
Biar lupa dimakan hari
Tolong ingatkan aku
Kisah kau tersedar
Dengan saku penyeluk masa
Kau dampingi aku
Setiap detik jantungku berdetak
Setiap nota jiwaku berlagu-lagu
Bila marah merasuk minda
Kecewa menyelubungi jiwa
Aku lupa
Tolong ingatkan aku
Kisah ku tersedar
Dengan kasih memeluk rasa
Ku teringatkanmu
Setiap detik jantungku berdetak
Setiap nota jiwaku berlagu-lagu
Tolong ingatkan aku kisah kita
Tolong ingatkan aku
Kisah ku tersedar
Dengan kasih memeluk rasa
Tolong ingatkan aku
Kisah kita
Monday, December 20, 2010
somehow still can't totally 4get..
oh God help me please...
how to let go and 4get all the past...
sometimes I wish I had memory loss..
so that I won't remember a thing..
hate3!!!
hm... however, it's bad to pray bad thing happen to ourself..
we have to face the reality anyhow...
oh..
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim....
